When the choice has been made to begin a family with your partner it seems most people have a sort of plan that goes with it. More and more in today's world couples are choosing to raise children in as much of a gender-neutral environment as possible. In the various stories I've heard it's generally because the parents believe in equal rights for all and don't want to pressure a child into feeling as if such a large choice has already been made for them before they can even say their alphabet.
What I'm more interested in was stemmed by an article I read from the Huffington Post (linked at the end of this post); parents choosing to raise gender-neutral babies because one of them is trans*. In this article a couple, Erin and Evan, were only months into the process of trying and conceiving a child when Evan came out as a trans* woman. I particularly enjoyed this article because it addresses the benefits and triumphs of the couple, but Erin also discusses her struggles with Evan's transition. She addresses how her "years of gender socializing" guided her initial thoughts of her partners transition. It was interesting to see the concepts of our readings and class discussions be applied so heavily to a real life situation. As a queer woman I've gone through various challenges but I don't feel I've ever experienced anything of this magnitude.
For some, a partner's abandonment of their heternormative privilege and social status would be too much. Fortunately for the couple they were able to support one another and continue forward in raising their child. Erin discusses that Evan's transition led them to make sure they would raise their child as gender-neutral as possible, though they had been considering it prior to Evan coming out. With this they acknowledged the challenges they may face in a society where everything is color coded based upon the gender of a child/person. What I gathered from a family photo posted with the article is that they've been successfully doing the most important thing of all; raising a happy child that is very loved.
My Partner Came Out As Trans While I Was Pregnant
I really loved this blog. It was incredibly interesting. My parents have been always very open about what is going on in the world (sexually and otherwise), but they don't know much about transgender because they weren't brought up in it. Therefore, I have to get my information elsewhere and share it with them. This is a great blog for this. It was interesting to read about heteronormativity and how Erin overcame that in order to raise a son with the person she loves. There is no reason a transgender person cannot raise a child. As far as I am concerned, if they had enough confidence to go through with the sex change, if they have enough strength to hold up to society, and if they have enough love for their partner and they show it, then they are fit to be a parent. After all, the will probably teach their child what a good person they can become too. I love that they are starting their child out gender neutral. That way the child can figure out who they are. Heteronormative is so overrated.
ReplyDelete-Rachael Belcher